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Thai girls are racist – Here’s What they think of you

August 19, 2013 Mike 13 responses

 

 

Racism has two meanings.  The first is the KKK type of racism where one thinks that a certain race is superior to any other race.  Thai girls are NOT this kind of racist!  But the second meaning in the definition of “racist” is:  prejudice based on race.  And many Thai girls that I have met fall into this category of being racist.  Needless to say, there are exceptions, but don’t be surprised if a Thai girl makes some initial judgments of you based on the color of your skin.   

I get emails once in a while from guys asking me how Thai girls will judge them.  I wish I could tell them that the girls will judge them based on WHO THEY ARE, but that won’t be the case in many situations.  And they really seem to toe the line in terms of their ridiculous pre-conceived judgments about entire races of people; many of them judge similarly.  The silver lining is that they are not incredibly stubborn about their judgments, and it doesn’t take much for them to change their mind.  There is a big difference between being intolerant and being judgmental; Thai girls are only guilty of the latter.   



Whenever the topic of race comes into the picture I know I’m going to get some interesting comments and emails.  It’s a polarizing topic.  And it’s strange to write about it because I can’t help but contradict myself.  Here I am writing a piece about how Thai girls like to stereotype people, and yet I’m stereotyping Thai girls in the process – it’s a Catch 22.  I’m not saying that all 33 million Thai girls are the same!  I just think it’s worth noting that many of them seem to have similar judgments about race, but it’s certainly far from absolute.  And as I mentioned before, they’re not extremely close minded; it’s not uncommon for them to change their mind about the way they judge people.  But it may only happen when they see just how wrong they are.

I’m going to go over what they think of each specific race with some talk about nationality.  Some of this will be offensive, but I’m going to be honest.  I share NONE of the opinions I’m about to give you, they’re only the opinions of the portion of the Thai girls that I consider to be very judgmental.  Perhaps it’s 1/3 of Thai girls who feel this way; maybe it’s even 50%+.  There is no way to put a number on that.  I can only tell you that too many of them feel this way for me to ignore the trend.  And yes, that was pretty much a 4 paragraph disclaimer!

 

What judgmental Thai girls (not all Thai girls) think about... 

 

Black Guys:  First of all, the “N” word is tossed around between Thai girls pretty damn loosely.  Some of them don’t understand just how bad a word it is.  I know you might think it’s an excuse, but remember that some of these girls aren’t exactly Rhodes scholars.  Some of them really don’t know it’s a bad word because nobody ever told them it was.  I have black friends who tell me they hear something like “Nikko” from time to time when they are out an about in Thailand  It’s not being said directly to them, but it’s being used in conversation about them, kind of like the way I hear “farang” being used about me.   If you’re a black guy and you hear it, it would be a good idea to just pretend you didn’t.  I know that is easy for me to say, but believe me, they just don’t know what the F they’re saying.    

One common trend you’ll see in many of these is that Thai girls don’t really differentiate between countries for races.  So if a black man is from Nigeria, they will think he’s pretty much the same as a black man from the U.S.   And what do they think about blacks in general?  Well it’s interesting because they don’t stereotype them for having traits that you might hear in awful racist jokes.  Their problem more or less comes down to the actual color.  Remember that Thai ladies do whatever they can not to have color, including using expensive whitening creams and wearing jeans to the beach.   So it’s just the color that some of them aren’t into.  When it comes to wealth, intelligence, etc., Thai girls don’t seem to be too judgmental one way or the other for black men in those areas. 

I have talked with some American black men who came to Thailand on vacation and weren’t thrilled about the way they were treated.  The guys did admit that they had unrealistic expectations because they had been informed that the girls LOVE black men.  As it turned out, it wasn’t the advantage they thought it would be.  Some girls had a real fondness for them, but they said more seemed to go the other way with it.  I think there is a sentiment that Asian women really like black men; perhaps there is something to that.   But Thai girls may be an exception to that rule.  There are certainly some Thai girls who love black men, but plenty who don’t.  It’s not that you’d have any problem here if you’re a black guy,   you wouldn’t!  It’s just that you wouldn’t have “your pick.”   Maybe half of the bar girls are into black guys, and a % of them LOVE black guys. 

One advantage a black guy might have is that he might not be targeted as being a weak hearted sucker.  The con artists out there (there are some), love targeting older white men for that.   And for long term relationships I think we all have it pretty much the same, meaning that: as long as we take care, they take care. 

Stupid side story, but a black friend of mine from the US visited me here for a little while.  In some of the GoGo’s we went to there was sort of a procedure that would take place instantly.  AS soon as we were seated, the girl with the biggest ass in the room would be sent to my friend, as if it was obvious that he would prefer her over the other smaller assed girls.  The funny thing is, my buddy really does like big asses, so this tactic was actually beneficial for him.  But I think it just goes to show how open Thai girls are about having their stereotypes, like there’s nothing wrong with it. 

 

White Guy under 30:   This is an interesting category.  Many ladies seem to be most attracted to men who fit this description, but don’t confuse attraction with appeal.  If you’re a good looking young white man you will clean up in terms of one night stands and you’ll even get some freebies from bar girls.  But the girls won’t think of you as being much of an eligible bachelor for a long term relationship, not compared to older men.  They’ll also think that you’re a “butterfly” and that you’ll never be faithful to them.  I guess they just don’t think a man with that many options will be able to resist the temptation.  Sometimes they correlate age with intelligence, which is a mistake on their part.  With age comes experience, but intelligence is something you’re born with.   Thai girls don’t have such a firm grasp on that concept.  They also correlate age with wealth, which makes a bit more sense. 

So being in this category is great if you can take advantage of it, you can essentially be a “booty call” for as many ladies as you want.  But I have spoken with some heartbroken young men who just couldn’t understand why a girl they loved left to be with a man 20 years older than them.  If you’re young you’re only excelling for these girls in one category, attraction.  And while that is important, in the long run it might not be as important as wealth and stability. 

 

White Guy over 40:   There’s good and bad to being in this category.  I think many Thai women think that this is the ideal category for finding a spouse, so that’s good.  But I think some of them believe this because they think guys in this category are heartbroken suckers who are ready to spend real money on love.  If you’re 60 you have to understand that a 24 year old girl is not going to be attracted to you in the same way she would be if you were 30 years younger.  AS I mentioned earlier, attraction isn’t the most important thing to Thai girls, so it’s easy to get past this.  However, issues of being “faithful” can sneak into the picture if there is a significant age gap.  Granted, some girls will cheat on any guy they’re with because they’re just a POS, and that’s true in every country.  But in my experience I think a good Thai girl is likely to be faithful if there is a real attraction there.  And I think there is more of a risk of being unfaithful if there is a huge age gap and less of a real attraction. 

IF you take good care of yourself it obviously helps.  We all know this isn’t about a number, it’s about appearance.  And there are some 50 year old men who look better than most 30 year olds, obviously they have no issues.  In that case you can really have it all, because they’ll think you’re smart, good looking, wealthy, and stable.  But if you do look your age and you’re no spring chicken, you have to understand that some women will target you for financial reasons.   It's not that they think middle aged or older white men are rich, they don't think that at least not compared to Japanese men.  But they do think that they all "have money," certainly enough to change their own lives. 

Look, this category is the most common customer for bar girls and that’s not going to change.  So obviously things are pretty decent, otherwise men over 40 wouldn’t come so often.  Again, the young girls will be more attracted to younger men, but you’ll actually be more appealing to them, especially for the long term.  Just knowing that there is close to an even playing field between a 55 year old guy and a 25 year old guy vying for a Thai girl’s attention is amazing, even if it’s not for the best of reasons.   

*Also, whether you’re a young white guy, middle aged, or older, don’t expect the girls to differentiate between you and other white guys around your age from different countries.  It’s basically about whether or not you speak English and that’s about it.  Bar girls may be partial to a particular country because they had a good experience or two with a man from there, but other than that you’ll get the same kind of judgments thrown your way regardless of where you’re from.

 

Indian/Arab:   I’m only grouping these two together because that’s pretty much what Thai girls do.  And unfortunately, nothing I’m going to say here is positive.  One of my very best friends in the world is Indian and for me this issue of Thai girls and race all started many years ago when he asked me, “Will I have it as good as you do when I vacation there?”   Being just a rookie here at that point I told him I’d have to get back to him on that.  So after asking around and figuring things out, I had to tell him the sad truth.  No, an Indian or Middle Eastern guy is not going to have it as good here, and that’s just the way it is.  As much as Thai girls love to spread their racism around to many races, they go above and beyond when it comes to brown guys.  It pains me to say it, but they think they’re:  1) Cheap  2) Not Wealthy  3) Not Clean.   There are plenty of bar girls who have no problem entertaining men of this category, but a significant chunk of them would only do so if they don’t think they have any other options.  There is even a percentage who would just be dead set against it in any scenario.   My friend is a great guy and he’d destroy all of their ridiculous stereotypes if they just spoke to him for a few minutes.  And I think most Thai girls would be willing to “forget” that he’s Indian the minute they realized this about him.  But there’s no question that the initial judgments of him would be a nuisance.

 

Asian (not Thai):   If you’re Asian and you lived in Europe or the U.S. for the majority of your life, don’t expect Thai girls to notice the difference.  So if you’re Chinese American they’ll think you’re the same as a man who lived in China for his whole life.  They’ll find it nice that you can speak English, but that’ll be just about the only difference they notice.  Their generalization towards you for being a non-Thai Asian man, is that you’re very wealthy.   There are wealthy Japanese and Chinese men who travel to Thailand, but I think the majority earn middle-class incomes.  So that could be a sort of disadvantage in a way, because the girls think you’re rich even if you’re not.  I know many girls in the GoGo’s charge 3,000 for a white guy and 5,000 for an Asian guy.  It’s ridiculous but it’s true.  There’s also not much of a long term play here, not because Thai girls wouldn’t be interested, but because it’s their perception that the Asian man wouldn’t be interested in them long term.  They think Asian men are smart and will not be suckered.  They don’t look at the extra fee for the st/lt as being a con, they just think they should pay more because they have so much more, which is insane.  But past that it’s not as if these girls are trying to line up Japanese men to be their sponsors, they think only older white men are dumb enough for that.

 I have met a GoGo girls who only want Asian customers because they make more money that way, some of them can even speak a little Japanese.  On the flip side of that, there are some girls who don’t want Chinese or Japanese clients because they think they are deviant in the bedroom.  Yes, there are actually girls out there who would lump more than a billion people into the same category because of something they heard once.  I spoke to a hot GoGo girl who told me she doesn’t go with Asian customers and when I asked her why, her response was one of the most outrageous things I’ve ever heard.  She said, “Man Jean and Man Yipoon  (that’s China and Japan), likes lick poosey for two hours, and that’s no good for poosey because it  no beautiful if you do dat too much.”  Seriously, that’s what she told me.  Anyway, other than that notion of brilliance, I think the girls think Asian guys are smart and wealthy, which has it’s ups and downs.  

 

Spanish/Latin/South American:   There is nothing to say here, except Thai girls don’t even acknowledge your existence despite the fact that you occupy a continent +.  It’s not that they’re ignoring you; they don’t even know what you are.  There isn’t much more to say about it, I guess not a lot of Spanish guys pass through here.    So they’ll just mistake you for being something else.  And when you tell them what country your family is originally from, they’ll just look really puzzled. 

 

Thai:    Thai girls are prejudice against everyone including their own!  Now if a Thai man is wealthy and he’s a good guy, that’s the #1 score for a Thai girl.  It shouldn’t be surprising.  They share the most common interests with Thai men, so as long as the man has money and is nice, this is their 1st pick.  But, nice rich Thai guys are an endangered species, and they get paired off with white skinned and/or wealthy girls.  The rest of the Thai girls don’t have much of a shot with a guy like that.  Good girls often then settle for a “nice Thai guy” if they can find one.  The thing is many Thai women think that Thai men are dunks, cheats, and deadbeat Dad’s.  This is irritating too, because many Thai men are not like that at all.  I know plenty who are great Father’s and break their back to provide for their family.  And yet some Thai girls will think the safer play is an older white guy.  If this prejudice against their own countrymen didn’t exist the entire farang/Thai girl scene would be a heck of a lot different than it is.  In the U.S., if a girl’s first boyfriend is a dipsh*t, she usually holds out just enough hope that her next boyfriend will be different.  But in Thailand, many women who have a dips*it first boyfriend or husband just say, “screw it” and focus on foreigners. 

 

I know I’m going to get some sh*t for this one, but it needed to be done.  Just remember that most of the girls will forget all about their stereotypes once they get to know you. But knowing what those stereotypes are helps to know what you are dealing with. 

 

About 

Mike is from the U.S. and has lived in Pattaya for 5 years. He left a job at a web design firm to become a traveling freelance writer/web designer. Mike has more than a decade of experience as a professional writer and as a web designer. He was married and divorced before leaving the U.S., and has vowed never to marry again. He loves Pattaya, Thailand, business, and women. Mike isn’t shy about sharing his experiences and his knowledge with anyone and everyone. He has a unique point of view that can easily be appreciated and he puts great effort into writing well thought out, helpful, and factual articles and posts. Catch up with him on Google +

13 Responses to Thai girls are racist – Here’s What they think of you

  • Kalpn says:

    The Asian (not Thai) review is spot-on. They expect you to pay big and tip big. When I tip according to ‘market rate’ or below their expectations, you can expect them to frown. Not a very nice position to be in because of my meagre income.

    I am chinese (not from China) and speak english to them. But they always guess my home country as China even though probably less than 5% of China chinese can speak basic english.

    At the bars or gogo, their approach are generally different. They are probably less quickly to stick and more likely to wait the asian customer to act.

    • Mike says:

      yea i only know this from seeing one of my friends constantly go through it. Other than the way he looks, he has so much more in common with me than he does with anyone who was born and raised in China. And yet we get treated differently and they assume he has more money to burn. I don’t understand how the girls don’t pick up on the fact that he speaks the same way that any guy from the U.S. speaks. But to them nationality means little and race means everything. I love going out with him and just seeing the girls have the confused look. I know they’re thinking, “why falang and man China sit together.”

  • anamika says:

    That was an entertaining read & I thought I would add my two cents. There’s several things to be taken into consideration here – lack of or little education, a serious inferiority complex with who you are, the colour of your skin and a huge infatuation over anything white. But I feel that primarily, the lack of education is the biggest reason for this stereotyping.

    I’m an Indian, and I have experienced racism in Thailand. These girls can spot us a mile away and like you said, they think we are cheap and don’t have any money. But, what can I say, SOME Indian men are cheap and Exchange rate IS a bitch. An average male from the Europe or the US can afford to blow much more money than an average Asian without feeling the pinch in his pocket.

    Most of us bargain hard, but not all of us are cheap. Bargaining is ingrained in us especially since we have to fight for little resources back home which are to be shared by a billion people.

    The sad part is, this racism happens everywhere & not just in Thailand. Most Indian men/women prefer white skin. They are naive enough to paint everyone with the same brush.

    • Mike says:

      thanks for the comment and well said. It’s understandable if a lot of Indians don’t have the same spending power, it’s just a shame that they get looked down on by Thai women because of it. And if a couple of white guys do something awful, the girls don’t think all white guys are evil, but it seems like some Thai girls think badly of Indian men because they heard a bad story or two.

      Go on facebook and look up a girl named Barby Bee from Pattaya. Yesterday she said something nasty about Indian men, stereotyping the lot of you because of a few bad apples. To make things worse, about 40 white guys agreed with her and made horrible comments of their own. The only person who stood up for an entire race of men was cursed out by several people and she deleted his comment shortly after. The whole thing made me sick.

      I don’t see the problem getting any better anytime soon. But there are some Thai girls who aren’t racists, and I guess for your sake you just have to be a little patient to find them. You seem to have a good attitude about the whole thing.

      Thank for stopping by!

  • eddy says:

    Nicely put Mike,i think you got it pretty spot on.

    • Mike says:

      Sorry that you have to go through that. But luckily the issue is based on ignorance with these girls and not hatred or anything like that. So once they get to know you then the color of your skin matters much less. Thanks for stopping by!

  • KAIO says:

    This was pretty dead on from my experiences. I’m Latin, but not from south america. The closest thing to my people are the brazilians. I have the darkest complexion of any in my family which actually helped me out while in Thailand. Many of my family could pass for white, but most of them would have been categorized as arab or indian. I was confused for arab, indian, as well as light skinned black guy. So i got to experience a nearly full spectrum of judgement over the month I spent there. That is, until i figured out that my treatment really depended on how i wore my hair. long and straight, short cropped, then medium length and curled. Rather then try to explain that im not indian or arab, i opted to spend a lot of time sun bathing until i was a shade darker than most thais and threw some moose in my hair to keep it curly. I just told everyone i was a black guy. That worked out well. I did get approached by tons more women who assumed i was american or english black. women became friendlier. I noticed that i got preferential treatment over the darker skinned african americans there and since im in my early 30’s and a bit of a fitness freak i was even getting sought after more so than many of the white. It was a strange 180 from when i arrived with longish straight hair and a lighter complexion.

    • Mike says:

      hi there; I’m sorry you have to put so much thought into dealing with their racial ignorance, but you have a really good attitude about it. Some guys really take offense, but that doesn’t get them anywhere. thanks for the comment.

  • El G says:

    Great Article Mike! Keep writing…)

  • sol says:

    Great Article and Great website in general.. You obviously gave me some food for thought today. I plan to visit Thailand this coming March to meet a girl I met on-line and was planning to keep her as long term girlfriend. We do not do skype.. but we talk every day at least for 2 hrs. She is 16 years younger than me and is way more mature than I was at 28..
    By the way.. I am black, actually one of the first ladies I met online who was a college professor who changed her mind when I was about to buy a ticket, in Dec. Her reason, regardless how much we clicked, she is a bit too old to play the girlfriend as she is turning 40 this year. And she would like to have a girl within the next year or so.. but not from a black a guy. Thus, she decided to go back to 66 years old Croatian ex-boyfriend who she calls cheap bastard and crude.. intellectually beneath her.

    • Mike says:

      hi Sol,

      thanks for reading, sorry you went through that…that’s really rough. It’s just crazy how blunt she was. She could have given you an excuse or just told you she was ready to move on, but instead she actually told you that race was an important factor in her decision. Lots of other Thai fish in the Thai see bud. Don’t put too much stock in anyone girl you meet online until you get to spend a lot of time with her. http://stayinginthailand.com/guys-in-full-blown-relationships-with-thai-girls-they-never-met-skype-sex That’s a link to an article I recently wrote about long term relationships with girls you only met online, i think it’s a worth a read.

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